Culture Shock

Processing and then communicating the lessons learned on a mission trip is obviously one of the most important aspects of the journey but also one of the most difficult. Words and stories really don't do justice to the experience. It's not unlike trying to explain a life transforming encounter with God. Any attempt to communicate what really happened seems to diminish the sacred nature of the moment. To try and give speech to experiences that left us speechless seems futile.

But here we are, back from Southeast Asia, desiring to be good stewards of the experience, the stories, and the lessons that we learned in the "Land of Wonders." My plan is to tell some of the stories through our talks on Sunday mornings. God taught our team some wonderful life lessons through the people we met and the things we saw. It was our privilege to partner with some incredible believers. These are people who are in the extreme minority and in many cases have been ostracized by their families because they follow Jesus. Their efforts to reach their friends and family with the good news of Jesus was both inspiring and humbling. So you will hear about them and the things God taught us through their commitment.

However, I do want to try and communicate one lesson that I was reminded of due to the extreme cultural difference we encountered. At times the cultural difference was shocking, and while I don't know if I can say that I experienced culture shock, what I do know is that I was keenly aware of the fact that I was not at home in their culture.

The most pronounced difference I noted was the assault on my personal space. WOW! It felt like there were people all over me all the time. Unless you've been there, I'm not sure that you can actually comprehend what it means to experience such egregious personal space violations. One evening we were having dinner at the retreat center where we were staying for our leadership conference. (Ironically, I was doing leadership training for these Christian leaders who should have been training me.) We were meeting in a Catholic retreat center, so there were lots of people there who were not necessarily affiliated with our conference. One night about 8 p.m. we entered the dining hall to have dinner. There were around 15 to 20 tables, with four to six chairs around each. My five teammates were sitting at two of the tables and, since we were alone, I sat at a table between the two by myself (room to breathe). While we were eating, six men came in, went through the line to get their food and proceeded to select their table. I didn't really notice where they were going to land until I felt a chair bump mine. As I looked up one member of my group was motioning for me to slide my chair in to give them room. If you could have seen the look on my face. There were 12 empty tables in that room and they sat at the one that squeezed me. I wanted to say ... well let's just say that I had some questions that I would've liked to ask at that time.

Why would they do that? The only explanation is that there is no such thing as personal space. From their perspective it wasn't rude, or inconsiderate or intrusive at all. It didn't occur to them that sitting at that table would be an inconvenience to me because they have no concept of the sacred nature of my personal space. Looking back it is still inconceivable to me that they would select that table, but they did because they look at the world through a different set of eyes. It is a cultural difference that doesn't make one of us right and the other one wrong, it just makes us see and think about things differently.

As I have looked back at that night and realized how uncomfortable I felt in their place, I have been reminded of just how important it is to consider how people feel in our place. For many people, church is a culture unto itself. When unchurched people who are seeking truth visit with us, they experience something that is completely foreign to them. Some of the things that are completely normal to us would be discomfiting to them and could cause them to miss the beauty of our community and our CAUSE.

I know good and well that the group of men in the dining hall owed me nothing. They didn't have a problem they needed to fix. I'm the one who needed to make an adjustment. However, when people come into our space looking for the truth, the tables are completely turned. It's our responsibility to try to understand their perspective, and work diligently to put them at ease in our environment. We have to do everything in our power to remove the distractions so they can have a life transforming encounter with the living God.